If you haven’t figured out how to have your family as your focus, along with success in other areas of life, this is for you.
I speak to a lot of parents, moms especially, who have either worked so much that they’re just burned out at the end of the day and they don’t have time for their kids and their spouses OR people who put their families first for so long that they haven’t made time to pursue their own passions and their own goals.
If you can relate to either of these scenarios then you know it can be painful, but it doesn’t have to be that way. You CAN have a balanced (most of the time) and successful family life along with your personal and professional life.
I Used to Suck at This
I have a balanced life now, but it wasn’t always that way. I really used to suck at this!
For the past 14+ years, I’ve been a self-employed entrepreneur. I started out as a licensed massage therapist working from home and from different PT offices. Then, when my husband and I were first married I started a personal training studio that quickly grew into a group fitness center.
As the business grew so did my responsibilities and time commitments. All of a sudden (before I got smart enough to build a team and let go of some control) I worked incessantly – day and night…sometimes even waking up in the middle of the night to work some more!
There was no stopping point for me. Can you relate?
Do you feel that the more you get done, the more accomplished you are, and the better you feel about yourself? That was my mindset for so long – the more I checked off my to-do list, the more productive I felt. Even if those things on my list weren’t producing real results.
The truth is, my sense of value and self-worth was tied to how much I worked and how much I got done in a day.
There were times I would work all night long. I would come back from the gym and have dinner with my husband and then I would find a way to believe that more stuff needed to be done. I’d be downstairs in my office – writing emails, blogs, workout programs, and meal plans until well past midnight.
Sometimes I would wake up in the middle of the night and do MORE work. It was constant. As you can imagine, that kind of output can be detrimental to your personal health, not to mention your personal relationships. I’ll never forget the day that my husband said to me… When are you going to me a priority the way you’re making your business a priority?
That was when I realized I needed to make a lot of changes.
I got help
Do you find yourself trying to do it all? I found myself trying to do everything on my own and getting stuck in perfectionism. I thought everything had to look and be done a certain way, but it didn’t.
Here are the 3 tips that helped me become more balanced and have a happier family life:
1.Outsource & Get Support. The more things you can get off of your plate the more you can focus on what is really producing results in your life, in your business, in your health, and with your family. Once I let go of some control, I was able to build a great team to support me in my fitness business. Now, as an online coach, I have a business coach, a virtual assistant, a technical support team, and a couple peer masterminds. The more team I have, the more successful I am, and the more time I have for self-care and family.
2,Set a Schedule. Plan out your day and stick to it as much as you can. Before you go to bed, determine what the one most important thing to get done the next day is, and commit to doing first thing in the morning so that it gets done before other distractions come up. This sets you up for a WIN. And it forces you to focus on the real priority. All the other things are minor and can get done when they get done.
3. Schedule Family Time. Make time in your calendar to spend uninterrupted time with your spouse and child(ren) individually, and as a whole family. You’ll deepen your connection, and your family will feel equally as appreciated and as important as your work. These days my husband and I have at least one scheduled date night, Saturday afternoons are special mommy-daughter time, and Sunday is family-fun day!
Family Life Today
My life used to be business first… then everything else.
Now I’ve created a “balanced” system that works for me, and for our family. I put balance in quotations because it’s important to recognize that some days, weeks, and months will be more balanced than others. If you’re working on a specific project, maybe you work a little more one week, then take off an extra day the next week.
Here is a glimpse into my schedule:
Lead by Example
I find it is important to be an example for my family and show them that making themselves a priority is important and that everyone has their space to pursue their goals and dreams.
I want my daughter and stepson to see that they are free to have a family, have a great relationships, have time for themselves, and pursue their career goals.
Yes, we can have it all…when we make time for it all.